Movies Movies Movies!

A fairly fluffy piece about the Writers Guild Strike in the US.




Wow. I’ve finally spotted something that is frankly too good not to take the piss out of, and the winner of that most illustrious and coveted honour of "Item that left me Shaking with Anger the most" is....

The Writers Guild of America strike.

Have you read about this before? I'm sure you'll have seen it at least in passing over the last year or so. Basically, the writers of Hollywood screenplays are a touch miffed at being regarded as the lowest form of life in the world of movies. They are basically (and probably justifiably) asking for more money and recognition. In support of this, pretty much all of Hollywood (actors, directors, pornstars etc.) is striking in a show of solidarity. If talks to resolve the situation are not successful by the end of the week, then we face a distinct lack of blockbusters at the cinema.

This situation does throw up quite a lot of questions. Why hasn't more been done to stop this? If everyone is striking in solidarity then who is the bad guy here? Couldn't we persuade the pornstars to keep working? Will this mean that actors will be picketing the studio's and signing on the dole? Not even just a few pornstars?

Okay, maybe the questions about the porn industry are not strictly relevant here, so let us put them to one side for the moment.

What does wind me up slightly is the fact that this is regarded as such a big screaming deal. So we're going to get a few less Hollywood blockbusters this summer. And this is bad because...? Does anyone actually remember going to see Battlefield Earth? Or Speed 2? Or Deep Impact? No? Shall I tell you why? Well, it's quite possibly because they were the most appalling lumps of excrement ever committed to celluloid. And what do all three of these films have in common? They're all (or were hyped as) Summer Blockbusters.

If Hollywood is not going to be churning out films that have plots more in common with paint by numbers than with any known works of literature, does that mean that independent film makers are going to get to have a go? If the huge special effects budgets are not going to be available, does that mean we'll see stories with characters that have depth and believable relationships? If studio executives are going to have to justify what they actually do for a change does that mean that whatever films do get made will be the creative vision of the director alone? Will films based on historical events actually bear any resemblance to recorded history?

Nope.

The film industry has more than enough scripts stored away to keep us in appallingly acted, second rate, and poorly executed films for the next decade. The promise of a big opening in lean times will undoubtedly secure the funding for effects laden films. And the power of the studio executive, chopping and changing a film to fit in whatever the most profitable market demographic of the moment is, will remain unchanged as long as we, the film going public, continue to flock to the cinema's to watch the celluloid slurry that is the norm these days.

I'm not going to deny that Gladiator was a tremendous spectacle, and being a passionate nerd when it comes to Star Wars I have few bad words about the Phantom Menace (despite the obvious flaws it had), but who goes to the cinema these days to see a film that genuinely challenges them? I rarely do because most films are so grossly insulting to the intelligence (I except the likes of LA Confidential and Se7en obviously).

That in itself is not a bad thing. I also go to the cinema to switch off my brain and enjoy a fun and uncomplicated evenings viewing. That is rarely possible these days as even the films that are supposed to fit into this category are for the most part so badly made as to be unwatchable. (Dungeons & Dragons anyone? Or Space Cowboys?)
And yet these films still charted. They've still had people going to see them because we just can't seem to get enough of their pretty bright lights and flashing colours. Why the hell should Hollywood have to worry about the strike when they know they can still dazzle us with their vivid explosions with "...a cast of fresh faced unknowns!" whom they coincidentally don't have to pay quite as much? Actually, maybe the prospect of consigning some of the current crop of actors isn't such a bad one...

So then; whether seeking highbrow intellectual or lowbrow fun films, we're probably not going to see that much change in the movie industry because of the screenwriters. If the purpose of the strike is to revolutionise the film industry, then they've gone about it the wrong way. If the public start to boycott cinema's on the grounds that they refuse to watch this shite any longer...well okay, then I will be encouraged. Not as encouraged as I will be when I hear that the porn industry has decided to call off any strike action obviously, but that's just me.