Settle For Less

Another rant that pretty much forced me to get up off my arse and try and build some sort of career.



Today finds me the recipient of a slap to the face by reality, rather like being awoken by a blow to the head from a 2 day old salmon left underneath a radiator in that it's unpleasant and leaves a foul aroma in it's aftermath. It would appear that I am doing a job that does not inspire me creatively and is not what I expected to be doing at this stage of my life. Happily (because I'm feeling rather misanthropic today) I'm by no means the only person in this situation. Of course, maybe I'm wrong about that. Maybe there are millions of children in primary schools right now who dream of becoming Telesales executives, or data analysts, or glorified button monkeys for some company or other. I very much doubt it though.

Yet here I am, encouraged from all quarters to settle for mediocrity and banality by doing a job that holds no challenge and gently chided by society should I wish to engage myself as a writer, an actor, or something equally as bohemian (as they see it). I have friends who would like to be actors or singers, vets or psychologists, yet they confess this grudgingly and always with a tone of “not that I ever will, but….”. What the hell is it that makes settling for second or third best second nature to us? I just don't get it at all. I mean Christ, it's not like we're not all packed with potential (with the possible exception of a man named Paul Edgar; he truly is a hopeless waste of time, bless him...) but we're still encouraged to aspire to banality. One can see examples of this in all strata’s of life. In the music world it is incredibly difficult to be successful if you write good music. Obviously taste differs as to what is "good", but pretty much all music lovers can appreciate a well-written song. And yet the route to financial reward is to perform anodyne shite that is about as inspirational as cancer. So whilst musicians with true talent languish in obscurity and poverty, the photogenic and talentless thrive and have done for years. Does anyone have any doubts about that? Okay, then how come Westlife have won Record of the Year for 3 years running? Can anyone actually remember how any of those "great" records went? No? Precisely, and yet this is where our adulation is supposed to be centred; not on genius but on glossy looking "nice young boys" who have the charisma of a religious fundamentalist at an orgy and produce inoffensive and instantly forgettable music.

I've touched on the world of film in the past but I'll restate my case; 90% of what appears on our screens is badly made, poorly acted drivel. Films that are made to be merely diverting end up being at best irritating and cloying, at worst plain offensively bad (step forward all people who had anything to do with making the film "Pearl Harbour"). The one or two exceptions are catapulted to classic status simply by virtue of not being insultingly awful (the Harry Potter film for example is a well made piece of escapism that will not change the world but will keep one entertained for a couple of hours). And yet films that (in my opinion) deserve to be considered as classics in the truest sense of the word (Memento, LA Confidential) are seen by a handful of people and tend to do far better after their cinema release.

And what about more the more commonplace side of things? Supermarkets ensure that, rather than shopping at a butcher's or a grocer's who will provide the very best available as their livelihood depends on it, we buy average (at best) food and if we don't like it then, well, we can go and f*ck ourselves because there are millions more customers who'll keep on buying. Politicians will make lofty promises and break them in exchange for base motives. Do we give a f*ck, or is it just easier for us to allow squalid corrupt little morons gradually corrode our quality of life? The 80's made compassion and interest in public affairs a bad thing, and our current government is quite happy to continue that state of affairs as it repeatedly a*serapes us for all we're worth whilst telling us it's for our own good.

Boy I'm in a mood.

Anyway, there are a few levels on which society glorifies the middle of the road. On an altogether more personal level we're pressured into doing the same. Unless you're lucky enough to be financially comfortable, fiscal pressures such as mortgages, loans etc pretty much make up our mind for us about accepting whichever tawdry and humdrum jobs are on offer. So we chain ourselves to telephone headsets or get nailed to computer keyboards and proceed to gradually, imperceptibly piss our lives and dreams away in exchange for the ability to pay the bills. I know of only 1 person who has had the courage to say "Balls" to the everyday pressures of banality and decided to strike out and follow his dreams. Obviously I can never tell him just how much I admire him for doing this (after all, he's fat and one can't give a fat man idea's above his station...) but all the same, such decisions are rare and should be encouraged.

Not that I'm naive enough to believe that following one's dreams is a sure-fire recipe for success. I'd always wanted to be a family law solicitor and I achieved that goal. Looking back now, I still love the law; I love its simple clean logic and it's analytical mindset yet I still left the profession. And why? Well, probably because I was cast adrift by the man who was supposed to be supervising and guiding me and left to sink or swim in a river of broken marriages, petty criminals, perverts, and paedophiles. When I had the temerity (the sheer *nerve*) to allow despair to overwhelm me, the B*STARDS turned their backs on me. Why was that? Mainly because I tried to be a little more than the blank legal cipher who views each case as a career opportunity and increased cash flow. In trying to be a better solicitor it would appear that I sealed my fate because it would have been easier to drift along and take the money. Once again, banality is plus point.

Now I don't mean to sound arrogant by that last point (aside from anything else I've wanted to get it off my chest for a while...) because I am 100% positive that I am not the only one left unsatisfied by the direction that my working life is going. Nor, judging by the conversations that I've had with my friends, am I the only one shite scared to actually do something about it. It has been written that every man and woman has the potential for greatness but an inclination towards failure. It seems to me that nowadays society does it's best to encourage us to believe that the best we can aspire to is mass-produced facile bullshit. Our media hardly encourages greatness as it shoots down anyone who gets "too big for their boots"; the only one's who get an easy ride (be they actors, musicians, politicians or whatever) are the one's who keep their heads down and don't attract too much attention to themselves. The hackneyed and predictable in other words.

It could just be that I'm being overtly pessimistic today. For all that few people manage to see their hopes come to fruition, perhaps most people accept this without rancour. Or perhaps people just don't think about it. Which is fair I suppose because dwelling on what you may have to look back on as your life's achievements when you're older and finding that they're as insubstantial as air is not how I'd choose to spend my time either. I can't help thinking that we'd all be better off if we actually acted on it rather than ignored it though. Ah well, I can dream I suppose. Now, excuse me whilst I write another mundane report and hammer another mundane nail in my coffin.